Hyacinth

you once told me
that you pictured me
in some tropical place
walking a road to a beach
with a hyacinth in my hair


you were probably too drunk
to remember that moment clearly


busy marveling at my willingness
to walk barefoot
on city streets

you may have never known
that single clear memory
etched itself on to my heart
and i feared that it would never happen

you may have never known
how i spent the next year
desperately searching for the words
to tell you
just how much i loved you

i still think of that moment
and mouth those words
through bitter hyacinth tears
to the empty space
where you should be